Apparently in French arenas the PA also spams the Seven Nation Army riff for no reason in any point of the game like they do in the US

French should be happy enough to have gotten to the finals of the 2 most important team sports in the Olympics at home, cause they ain´t winning any of both

What in the Southern Hemisphere is happening in this game?

Argentina 2004 was better than both the teams you chose for the comparison (France/Canada):

Sanchez - Ginobili - Nocioni - Scola - Oberto

(Also having a lot of talent on the bench, and most importantly a cohesive team performance and the most obvious fact of being the only team ever to get that gold medal other than the US since NBA players go to the Olympics)

Choosing between 2004 Argentina and 2008 Spain can be harder but in any order they are 1 and 2 in your FIBA teams list that have played against the US.