My basketball abilities are quite limited to say the least. My 5’7 stature puts me a significant disadvantage and my athleticism is near non existent. Having to constantly run up and down and court as well as stay in front of players is certainly a large downside of mine, and my ability to block shots certainly isn’t much of an improvement. Basketball IQ and playmaking are other areas in which practice is certainly a necessity and my shooting touch leaves quite a bit to be desired. Although I did get Lasik surgery so perhaps court vision could be one area of expertise.

So why bring this all up? Why mention all my shortcomings as a basketball player? What is the purpose of this post? Well, simply put, I have but one inquiry. Let’s say by some otherworldly magic I manage to gain hold on the remote control from Click (2006)? For those unfamiliar, Click (2006) is a comedy film starring Adam Sandler (1966) displaying a story about a melancholic family man who gains control of a device capable of controlling reality. The remote control is capable of muting others, and fast forwarding time. (I think I haven’t seen the movie in quite some time). Why mention the plot of an 8 year old movie you might ask? Well for the sake of the argument let’s say the magic remote is also capable of pausing and reversing time. Let’s say that as a 5’7 Mexican American Male, I manage to gain ahold of this magical device and using its infinite power, I use it to control reality and make things profitable for myself.

So the question now becomes, with the aid of this magic universal remote, capable of controlling reality with the ability to pause and resume time, fast forward as well as reverse, just how far could a 5’7 Mexican American Male make it in the NBA?

Let’s say I’m guarding Luka Doncic, an NBA superstar capable of making some of the craziest and most unique passes you’ve ever seen. As Luka makes an insane pass to an open teammate who no one seemed to notice, I manage to reverse time using the remote and am able to enter the passing lane for this seemingly improbable pass and thus make the steal leading to a fast break.

Let’s say I’m open in the corner during a close game and they pass me the ball and I shoot a 3 Pointer to tie the game. Obviously with my basketball prowess this would most likely be a huge airball, but with the powers of the remote I am able to reverse time and attempt again. Oh what’s that I missed another 3? Well just dust myself off and try again. Oh what’s that I missed another 3? Well I’ll just give it one more go and this cycle would repeat a handful of times until I can finally make the shot with ease.

Now obviously as crazy as this idea sounds and as powerful as I would be with said remote, there may be some things which I cannot control. Obviously no amount of pausing and reversing or even fast forwarding for that matter would be able to stop an Anthony Edwards dunk or a LeBron fast break or a Curry 3 pointer, and my shot blocking would still leave some to be desired as my ability to pause time would not allow for better athleticism. In a league full of genetic freaks and absolute power units of basketball all being well over 6’0 tall, as much as an advantage this would give, my dominance would certainly not reach its limit considering my varying other weaknesses. But overall what would my ceiling be? The Most Valuable Player award and All NBA team selections would most likely be a little too out of reach for someone such as myself, but perhaps Sixth Man of the Year would be well within reach such as Defensive Player of the Year as I would use my powers to help stop various plays.

Now you may be asking “Well with all this power would it not be more important to reverse engineer this device and understand the technology behind that and use that science to help further and advance humanity rather than use it for your own personal gain?” To which I would say well yes of course I would get around to doing that but achieving my dream of becoming an NBA player comes first as well as I could just reverse time and then do all my world saving later.

All in all, this question poses various moral implications such as “Are you even skilled considering you would just get multiple attempts?” or “What makes you think you should be the only one to wield this power?” but we are not here to talk morals, we are here to talk ball. So once again I ask you all, As a 5’7 Mexican American male, just how far could I make it in today’s NBA utilizing the remote from Click (2006)?